The Crab Chronicles Archives * Totally Naked Man

Major Cabbage

By Illya King Posted on March 24, 2023

Rose City in the daytime

Major Cabbage is screaming,

Major Cabbage is contemplating life.

Major Cabbage as set on his resolve to destroy Rose City.

Totally Naked Man punches Major Cabbage

Totally Naked Man declares victory.

Totally Naked Toy

By Illya King Posted on March 31, 2023

Zetaman introduces himself and Totally Naked Man.

Zetaman starts his tutorial.

Zetaman removes the clothes off a G.I. Joe.

Totally Naked Man interrupts Zetaman.

Totally Naked Man explains his transformation.

Totally Naked Man explains his mindset.

The Crab Chronicles

By Illya King Posted on June 23, 2023

Totally Naked Man faces Dr. Clawson Crabbington for the future of Rose City,. — Totally Naked Man must face the future as he combats the Evil Dr. Clawson Crabbington.

Night Patrol

By Illya King Posted on June 30, 2023

Rose City from the rooftops.

Totally Naked Man from behind on a rooftop.

The science campus of Rose City State University.

Masked Men break some windows.

Bystanders are witnessing a crime in progress.

Totally Naked Man vows to stop some criminals.

Crime Stopping

By Illya King Posted on July 7, 2023

Totally Naked Man leaps into action.

The hooligans don't know who just leap at them.

Totally Naked Man explains his purpose.

Totally Naked Man punches a hooligan.

Totally Naked Man punches a hooligan.

The hooligans admit defeat.

Victory

By Illya King Posted on July 14, 2023

Totally Naked Man declares himself the victor.

One citizen admires Totally Naked Man's efforts.

Another citizen is disturbed by Totally Naked Man.

A citizen yells at Totally Naked Man.

Totally Naked Man is blinded by some light.

Two people walk through a portal in the air.

Back to the Future

By Illya King Posted on July 21, 2023

Heroes arrive from the future to talk to Totally Naked Man.

Pax-el explains herself.

Totally Naked Man is excited.

Future Heroes

By Illya King Posted on July 28, 2023

Filbert explains who he and his partner is.

Pax-el talks about Totally Naked Man's influence.

Pax-el gets to the point.

Filbert tells Totally Naked Man humanity has been turned into crabs.

Totally Naked Man thought man would de-evolve into monkeys.

Pax-el opens a portal into the future.

Clawson Crabbington

By Illya King Posted on September 8, 2023

Pioneer Courthouse Square in the future.

Heroes arrive and see crab humans.

Totally Naked Man is astonished by crab humans.

Filbert explains why humans are crabs.

Introducing Doctor Clawson Crabbington.

Sneaking

By Illya King Posted on December 1, 2023

The Science One building in the future Rose City State University Campus.

The heroes walk down a hallway.

Totally Naked Man peeks behind him to see into the next room.

The future heroes look into the next room.

Totally Naked Man is shocked by what he sees.

The Crab Lab

By Illya King Posted on December 8, 2023

Totally Naked Man views a human/crab hybrid in a tank.

Pax-el noticed something behind Filbert.

Dr. Clawson Crabbington enters the lab.

Totally Naked Man yells at the crab doctor.

Being Crabby

By Illya King Posted on December 15, 2023

Doctor Crabbington is not happy to see a naked man.

Doctor Crabbington explains that it is impossible to stop human/crab people.

Totally Naked Man responds with threats of violence.

Filbert searches Dr. Crabbington's lab.

Totally Naked Man and Dr. Crabbington brawl.

Crab Fight

By Illya King Posted on December 29, 2023

Totally Naked Man punches Crabbington.

Totally Naked Man's hand hurts.

Dr. Crabbington laughs at Totally Naked Man.

Dr. Crabbington walks away while Totally Naked Man uses a pipe.

Totally Naked Man hits Crabbington with a pipe.

Crabbington is on the ground while Totally Naked Man threatens him.

Crab Walk

By Illya King Posted on January 5, 2024

Dr. Crabbington is on the floor yelling at Totally Naked Man.

Dr. Crabbington crab walks away.

Totally Naked Man vows to bring Crabbington to justice.

Totally Naked Man rallies the heroes to give chase.

The heroes look down a long hallway.

Slip Slidin’

By Illya King Posted on January 26, 2024

Dr, Crabbington pushes a button.

Dr. Crabbington runs away.

Pax-el is talking.

Pax-el is talking.

Filbert discovers a hidden lab.

Totally Naked Man hears a door slam.

Closed Doors

By Illya King Posted on February 8, 2024

Pax-el verifies that the door is closed.

Totally Naked Man vows revenge.

Filbert has a new idea.

There is a list on Filbert's tablet.

Filbert explains his plan.

The heroes go back into the time portal.

Scene of the Crime

By Illya King Posted on March 2, 2024

The trio of heroes return from the future.

Totally Naked Man watches himself.

Pax-el stops Totally Naked Man.

Totally Naked Man Contemplates his legs.

Filbert gives the heroes the go-ahead to proceed.

Totally Naked Man reflects on his next actions.

Sushi

By Illya King Posted on March 13, 2024

Filbert leads the heroes into a lab.

There are tanks filled with crabs in a lab.

Totally Naked Man is pondering their situation.

Filbert types on a control panel which boils the crabs.

Cooked Crab explodes on the heroes.

Totally Naked Man is grossed out by the cooked crab.

Congratulations

By Illya King Posted on April 6, 2024

Totally Naked Man congratulates the future heroes.

The future heroes thank Totally Naked Man for his help.

Totally Naked Man shares his victory.

The lab is filled with broken crab tanks.

The future heroes leave.

Totally Naked Man has questions.

Crab Meat

By Illya King Posted on April 17, 2024

Workers are in a lab looking over data.

A scientist is reviewing the data.

Vega Bond is in the shadows.

The scientist questions Vega Bond.

A dead crab lays broken on the floor.

Language Crimes

By Illya King Posted on May 24, 2024

Outside The Alternates HQ.

Totally Naked Man is playing a card game with Extremely Conservative Woman in the back.

Totally Naked Man gives a snarky reply.

Extremely Conservative Woman is mad.

Totally Naked Man is incensed.

Patrick O’Toole

By Illya King Posted on June 7, 2024

An empty hole in the middle of the street.

Dick Fagan digging in the dirt.

Dick Fagan typing at his desk.

Patrick O'Toole appears on Fagan's shoulder.

Patrick O'Toole appears on Fagan's shoulder.

Patrick O'Toole rubs his hands in an evil manner.

Support System

By Illya King Posted on June 14, 2024

Outside The Alternates HQ.

Parachute Man makes fun of both Zetaman and Antiman.

Zetaman is defensive.

Dr. Lithium and Extremely Conservative Woman make fun of Zetaman's emotional stability.

iHero inquires about how many wives Zetaman had.

Totally Naked Man offers some sage advice.

Canned Slugs

By Illya King Posted on June 21, 2024

A television is displaying an ad for canned slugs.

A gaggle of Slugs

People enjoying Canned Slugs.

Chef Boyd R. Dee cooking canned slugs.

Al Fresco watching the TV.

Al Fresco disgusted by Canned Slugs.